Friendship

I don’t believe in lasting relationships, well ones that involve me. No I am not from a divorced family or had a parent “walk out” on me. It is me. People can not stay in my life long. I am not sure what it is I do but I do not keep friendships. Ever since I can remember I’ve never really had a true friend/friends. Flash back to 6th grade when I thought I had been an accepted friend only to find out I would become a target. My “true friends” were the same people to mercilessly torture me off the cliff and all the way down. So sure that does play a role in my trust issues, what about the other friends though? Well I poped in out of a few groups of friends and then was able to find a nitch with some really special girls. They are a few of the most special people I have meet. These girls were halirious! I rememeber Halloween, when I was Cleopatra and the girls were cats, I ended being typical Gaby. I had begun to sing Dominick the Donkey, yeah I know, but rather than teasing me, making me feel uncomfortable they joined in. That was great feeling. I still have rare communication with these girls, but emphasis on rare.. I know I was the one to switch schools but I felt bare minimum effort on their end, that really hurt. But so I adjusted. I began going out with my new Medway friends and would have a great time.. or what everyone says is a great time. My intrest in going out all the time decreased and so did my friends. Then my sophomore year I became great friends with a girl in my grade. I finally felt like I was not alone, I had a soild friend. I had a real honest friendship, to me this person was a great friend, because she was the best friend I ever had. Keep in mind though I’ve had poopy friends though. When my challenge became public knowledge, though I told her at the beginning, I believed she was there for me in full, like I would be there for her. Yet pretty soon she faded out. I understand that life is difficult and especially when trying to commicate with a person in the hospital, though if you care about someone you make sure to do something no matter how little. Being out of school as long as I was is no easy transition, and having all of this issues involving medical and non-medical at this time the last thing I needed was to be on the rockes with my best friend. I will cut all the drama out and leave it at this, I no longer speak to her well more factually SHE no longer speaks to me. It is repulsive to listen to her whine to me of her recent medical endeuvir because with her injury there ways a quick-ish fix. To be tossed a way like garbage from one of; Is unbareable. I am disguted the way she has become to treat me but there is no solution I have to realize  it. Here life is hers and I was deleted.

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One thought on “Friendship

  1. Gabby, keep writing. Your blog is great. Your blog is you. Your feelings are true and your words express your pain. It is good to express things. I will continue to check in and read your cool blog and look at your wonderful pictures here and there. Keep growing, living, and learning!

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